Natural disasters evoke feelings of helplessness, grief and anxiety. They disrupt our sense of normalcy and leave survivors wondering when it will all be over.
Dr. M. Ed Kelley is medical director of behavioral health at Sweeten Creek Mental Health and Wellness Center, a campus of HCA Healthcare's Mission Hospital. He provided strategies to deal with the onslaught of emotions any natural disaster like Tropical Storm Helene tends to evoke, strategies to navigate these emotions and signs you or those around you may be struggling and in need of a higher level of care.
They bring up some of our core fears, Kelley said, and create feelings of helplessness.
"Many people feel they have no ability to defend themselves," he said.
People also may feel a lot of grief over loss of property, normalcy, security and, obviously, lives.
Kelley said natural disasters generate a lot of anxiety. When is the power coming back? When is the water coming back? Is everyone I know and love safe? How long am I going to have to live this way? Will I be able to feed myself four days from now?
"A storm like this hits at the core of the safety and security that most of us normally have from day to day," Kelley said.
Kelley said he tells everybody they need to start with themselves.
"It may sound trite, but if you are not taking care of yourself, you can't take care of anybody else," he said.
Kelley said it is important to monitor how much you are sleeping and eating and if you are becoming overly emotional.
Another challenge is that many people aren't able to go to work. Kids may not be able to go to school. "You are no longer brushing your teeth at the same time every day," Kelley said. "One of the first things to go during a disaster is the sense of normalcy."
He suggests getting back on a schedule. Parents can help by setting a time every morning for everyone to wake up, followed by setting times for activities like taking a walk. And start brushing your teeth at the same time every day.
Also, get busy, Kelley suggests. Clear trees in your yard and in your neighborhood. Check in on your neighbors and spend time talking and hanging out with them, he said.
He shared an experience in his own neighborhood, when a home with a Starlink unit was providing the only WiFi he and others could easily access.
As folks gathered there to reach out to others online, they connected with one another as well, he said.
"It wasn't the WiFi that was healing," he said. "It was that sense of belonging and sharing our shared experiences with other people that was unbelievably, emotionally helpful for everybody."
Trauma diffuses when you share it, Kelley said.
"You realize other people are having a similar experience," he said. "Sharing that burden with one another really does help."
And lastly, people have to be willing to accept help, Kelley said, whether that is in the form of shelter, food or water.
"I think when we are fragile, we need to accept that," hey said.
Kelley said parents should look for signs of stress in their children.
"With kids, their appetite and sleep patterns are huge. If you are noticing huge changes in those two things, you know they are struggling," he said.
More: Helene's human aftermath: Here's what to know as children process post-disaster trauma
Rather than talk about the stress and anxiety they are feeling, children and teens tend to get angry, have temperamental outbursts or become severely withdrawn.
"Kids are not as good as adults at identifying sadness and anxiety," he said. "It tends to come out in behaviors."
To head that off, Kelley suggests asking your kids how they are feeling. Check in with them and ask how they are doing, he said.
Then, as he suggests for adults, Kelley recommends getting kids back on a schedule, too.
Kelley again stressed the need to start taking care of yourself right away and engaging with other people.
If you start having panic attacks or are having overwhelming feelings that you can no longer cope with life, or you are having thoughts of giving up or harming yourself, call 988, the suicide and crisis hotline, or bring yourself to an emergency room.
"Severe lack of sleep, severe anxiety and severe hopelessness and helplessness would be times I would suggest reaching out for help," Kelley said.
"During times like these, we are also unfortunately at a huge risk for dropping into heavy substance use," Kelley said.
People use it to cope, but then it can trigger alcoholism and substance abuse problems.
"If that is becoming unmanageable, that is another reason to reach out for help," he said.
Sweeten Creek Mental Health and Wellness Center, located at 32 Apex Circle, reopened its day treatment program on Monday, Oct. 7.
The adult program operates the following programs:
Referrals can be obtained through Missionhealth.org/MentalHealth or by calling 828-213-4696.
North Carolina's Peer Support Warmline is for those in crisis who need to talk with a peer but who are not suicidal. Call 855-PEERSNC.
For those experiencing thoughts of suicide, call 988.
For life-threatening emergencies, call 911.
The National Alliance on Mental Illness of North Carolina's hotline is available from 8:30 a.m.-5 p.m. Monday-Friday at 800-451-9682 by emailing [email protected] or texting 919-999-6527.