Now listen here. Nobody is saying that Santa Claus isn't real.
According to recent polls, a full half of the country's children -- and even a good portion of adults -- believe in the jolly one. We propose that maybe that much belief by itself is enough to ensure that Santa will always exist and that we can count on him to come on Christmas Eve.
If Santa lives in your heart, he's real enough and nobody here will try to tell you different.
Yet for many kids, the belief in Santa comes to an end at some point, and when it does, sometimes the message is a shock.
One local man changed his mind about Santa after he was bit in the face by a dog.
Another girl was told by her father, a Marine, that ol' St. Nick's sleigh had been shot down over a far-away land.
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A woman in Auburn remembers catching her father playing Santa in the basement and like that, the belief was over.
What? No burly, bearded bringer of gifts flying across the skies and shimmying down chimneys on Christmas Eve?
No benevolent soul living with elves in the North Pole and rewarding good behavior with presents delivered right to the tree?
Say what you will, but for most children, the disbelief in Santa is the first real big heartbreak in their young lives.
We asked our readers to recall when they first truly doubted Santa, and the answers ranged from hilarious to crushingly sad. Some came to the conclusion in bizarre ways while others did it on their own, either through sleuthing or happenstance.
"My dad dressed up like Santa and when he came in with the presents I immediately noticed that Santa had the very same wingtip shoes that my dad wore every day," recalls Jerry Blais of Lewiston. "I was 6 or 7. It really didn't affect me as long as I got presents -- I didn't care if Captain Kangaroo dropped them off."
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James McCarthy of Jay was at a first-grade Christmas party when things just seemed . . . off.
"One of the janitors, who was also my bus driver, came into the room dressed as Santa," McCarthy says. "But he was wearing a quite obvious cheesy plastic mask. A few kids thought it was Santa. I knew better."
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Laurie A. Hallett of Auburn got a sneak peak into Santa's workshop when she was 10 years old, and that's when the pieces began to come together.
"I heard my Papa in the cellar, putting together my brother's Big Wheel that was from 'Santa,'" she recalls. "My Papa was upset with himself for being too noisy, and I assured him it wasn't his fault! Then I quietly thanked my parents for all the extra presents over the years, from Santa. I was devastated when I figured it out, but my sister and I kept the secret, for our younger brothers."
Bob Stone of Lewiston had no such big moment of revelation. He was a smart kid. There was just something about this story of a fat man visiting every home in the world all on one winter night that didn't add up.
"I was never told that Santa wasn't real," Stone says. "I just kind of accepted that he wasn't. I felt a little sad when it started to sink in."
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By the time Sara Jane of Lewiston was 8 years old, her intellect had developed to the point where she was able to put two and two together to deduce that something fishy was going on at Christmastime.
"I pointed out to my parents that my Dad and Santa had the same handwriting," Jane recalls. "Then, I learned where my parents were hiding my Christmas presents so I peeked and saw a pink remote-control car. On Christmas Day, 'Santa' gave me the pink remote control car. That night, they told me the truth and I said, 'So you lied to me?'"
Ouch. But whatever. When you get right down to it, those kids got off easy. Try on Daniel Tanguay's experience for size. When this Lewiston man was a boy, it took facial trauma and some older cousins to change his mind about Santa. Not to mention the reindeer with the glowing red nose.
"That was a rough Christmas," Tanguay says. "I was 6 years old. First I had my lip bit by a Pomeranian at one family member's Christmas Eve party. Hospital, shots and stitches ensued. Then at Reveillon -- the big party after midnight Mass -- one of the adults pointed out the red light on the radio tower, saying it was Rudolph. All of the kids rushed to the window. My older cousins, Scott and Rick, pulled me back and said 'You know Santa isn't real right?' I consoled myself trying to eat the tourtière without hitting my lip that was quivering. At least I got some great toys that year."
Then there's Janet Denise, whose Marine father revealed that Santa and his crew had been shot down over Cuba and all was lost.
Janet says she adores her father, anyway.
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Lots of people who wrote to us explained that their belief in Santa came to screeching halts thanks to older siblings who couldn't wait to spoil the fun.
Dan Caron of Lisbon says he was just 5 years old when his sister informed him. His belief in Santa was shattered then, but maybe belief can be regained.
"I'm 62 now," Caron says, "and still believe he is real!"
For others, it was the mall-type Santas that seemed just too suspect to believe.
"I found out because Leroy Frank used to play Santa at Peck's (department store in Lewiston) and I would always go see him there when I was little," says Gail Shelley of Auburn. "Well, he lived down the road from me in Poland and used to ride his bicycle delivering newspapers. He didn't have to wear a fake beard because he legit looked like Santa. Well when I was about 7, we went to Peck's and I recognized him. He called me by name and I said, 'Hi Mr. Frank. I didn't know you were Santa, too.' He tried to convince me he was, but I didn't buy it. I did absolutely adore him though. That never changed. I never said anything though because I still wanted Santa to bring me presents. I was no fool."
Most people, even after growing to advanced years, can recall the magic of believing in Santa Claus and all of the rich traditions that went with him. Kids recall leaving out cookies and milk for Santa because, by God, magic or not, ol' St. Nick must get powerful hungry flying all over the world with sacks full of toys.
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But at some point in a child's life, the mind starts to sharpen. He or she begins to apply logic to things and, well, like with some other beliefs in life, logic can cause doubt. Kids are curious folks, and if they ask too many questions or peek around the right corners, the whole affair just starts to crumble.
"The first time I questioned Santa," says Terry Hutchinson of New Gloucester, "I had just recently turned 8 years old. I had always enjoyed flipping through my Mom's printed catalogs that arrived in the mail, but that year I noticed something -- they ALL mentioned 'stocking stuffers' for sale! 'BUT SANTA FILLS THE STOCKINGS,' I thought to myself, 'so why would people need to buy things to put in stockings?' Combine that with recognizing my aunt's handwriting on the tags 'from Santa' I put it together. I didn't say anything for a couple years though because I wasn't ready to let go of Santa."
"I recall around second or third grade," says Joseph Philippon of Lewiston, "classmates discussing this with some insightful peers explaining and questioning how Santa has the time and ability to enter every home, especially those with no chimneys."
Curious about this mysteries, Philippon found himself peeking downstairs where he spied his parents laying out gifts.
"After speaking with my parents," he says, "I learned the truth but enjoyed playing along for my younger cousins and school mates."
Like some others, Philippon also ponders how he will address the Big Santa Question with his own children.
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"Going to punt on it for however long I can," he says. "It is joyful to see wonder in action. I think when Jackson starts to ask questions I'll play along and give counter explanations like what you see in Tim Allen's 'The Santa Claus' movie. If he's shaving, then maybe I'll let him know then."
Frank A. Sanborn Jr. of New Gloucester learned about Santa when he caught his mother putting the stockings up and laying gifts under the tree. With his own children, he pushed the notion of Santa as long as he could.
Why not? As some parents have discovered, having their own children change their minds about Santa is as painful as when they went through the same thing as kids.
"My son (and I) were heartbroken when he found out," says Sandy Mathieu Paine of Lewiston. "I think he was in fifth grade and he found out from kids in school. I told him that Santa was not a person but someone in our heart. Thankfully he was on board with that answer."
"I don't remember when I found out," says Sally Townsend Theriault of Rumford, "but I clearly remember when my two daughters found out. My oldest daughter was 10 and she asked me if Santa was real. I asked her what she thought and she said she didn't think he was real. I told her she was right. She thought it was a riot that her father and I pulled one over on her. Forward two years to daughter No. 2, who was also 10 at the time. Again, I was asked if Santa was real and, again, I asked daughter No. 2 what she thought. She said she didn't think he was real and I told her she was right. She burst into tears and then said, "I guess you're gonna tell me Easter Bunny isn't real either!"
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Ayla Odiorne of Lewiston chose to be honest with her daughter about Santa, but at the same time, she doesn't want to ruin the magic for other kids.
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"I've talked to her about how special that tradition is for some families," she says, "and that we should respect other people's beliefs."
For Natasha Cote of Hartford, early belief in Santa was all mixed in with other traditions that didn't necessarily allow for some magical being climbing down chimneys and delivering gifts to well-behaved children.
It was particularly confusing for Cote because stories about Santa weren't accepted by the church she attended. Christmas was supposed to be about honoring the birth of Jesus Christ, after all. And that story by itself is special enough that there is no need to invent secondary characters to confuse things.
"You know," says Cote, "I don't really remember when I found out that Santa wasn't a real-life man at the North Pole. I remember early on, probably aged 5, getting gifts from my aunts labeled 'from Santa' and knowing they were just writing that and it was really them. I would assume I learned at church that Santa wasn't real because we went to a conservative Baptist church that viewed Santa as a devil and a distraction of Jesus's birthday celebration.
"People that celebrated Santa," Cote continues, "clearly didn't want God in their life and didn't want to face the truth -- this is a snip-it of things I was taught -- so growing up I also believed that Santa was evil and anything about the North Pole was just plain wrong to have around. Santa hats were not to be worn. Elves: no. Reindeer: We don't speak their names -- even though we secretly liked the song.
"You see," Cote says, "when you tell a child what you think the truth is they believe it. When you tell a child a certain lifestyle is how you please God they believe it. So if not celebrating Santa was the right thing to do to stay in God's good graces, we did it happily and confidently. As I grew up I was certain I would not have children being distracted from Jesus's birth. I can look back and remember though around the age of 9 and 10 wishing that Santa was real. Wouldn't it be neat if someone out there really could drive a sleigh and deliver gifts. I wanted it to be true during those young ages, even if I would have never admitted to it. As a teenager I didn't seek to destroy any little child's belief, but I was mostly surrounded by non-believers in the church anyways."
For Cote, the matter of Santa Claus was perhaps heavier than it is for most children and clearly she wrestled with it.
But after a lifetime of pondering the Santa question, should someone like Cote condemn others for continuing the traditions of Santa Claus in their own lives? Cote doesn't think so. She came to a point in her life where she could at least see what place Santa has in holiday celebrations.
"If some preacher thinks Santa is the devil so be it," Cote says. "He can think that. But letting others think that Santa adds to a fun celebration should be allowed because God allows free will. It's the heart that counts. If someone is celebrating Santa because they want nothing to do with God or Jesus then I think God sorts that out. We don't need to go above and beyond in my opinion. But if someone loves Jesus and is just having fun with all things in the North Pole, are they evil? I don't think so anymore. Allowing others to have their own beliefs -- and being confident in my own and always ready to explain to someone my own beliefs if someone asks -- has been a very freeing mindset in my adult life."
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